"What Can I Say," Brandi Carlile

huh.

It looks/seems/is absurd, of course, yet come snowfall I might be tempted to try it just once, eh? It would be REALLY wrong to arrange a little group-pee, but god the boys would DIE giggling. I'd never live it down (which also has a vague appeal hahaha). But why'd they make it so big? Well, . . . lol oy nevermind nevermind.

for virgo this week : "Water that is too pure has no fish," wrote Zen teacher Ts'ai Ken T'an. Keep that advice close to your heart in the coming days, Virgo. Your clean, clear ideas will become sterile unless you mix in some quirky, unruly emotions. Your spiritual intentions may become awkwardly rigid unless you loosen them up with a bit of healthy blasphemy. So please don't push for utter perfection. Be careful not to burn away every last flaw or banish every last messy doubt.

(level 2 scared me) [armscrossy]

robert plant & allison kraus - fortune teller

Jose Gonzalez - Killing for Love

Today

I block out with music the sound of yelling then sobbing (his) downstairs. I fight fret (I fail, miserably).

I leave, go to my competition prep class, come back, work and work and walk into the dining room off and on where sits on the dining table a big flowering mum with ear-colored blooms and I like it. I bought it yesterday for only 5 bucks cz it’s crooked, and on the table are the things I got the day before, a great deal on fall coats for the little guys ($8 closeout) and Gap boxers that say KAPOW.

I have no idea why, and really fear that I will never understand it in this life. What is Wrong (with me). I like to be happy and like making do with that, like happiness is a tight budget that can go far enough. I like to Be. And it’s not like I didn’t think that over, because I did. Obviously.

No wonder I like kids, they like to Be, it’s their job to work their leg muscles and smile at people they know and cry at people they don’t. That much I understand.


What do you call a penguin in the dessert?
What?
Lost.
[pause] (lol) I think you mean desert.
(giggle giggle)

.“. . . you will soon be dealing with a challenge you have faced before: how to synchronize your two major archetypes, the lover and the warrior. You will be asked to cultivate the tender, considerate instincts of the lover within you while simultaneously feeding the fiery discipline of your inner warrior . . .”

if only I could bow-pull my way through life

The problem with wrath is the same as lust. You have to desire to not-desire, so good luck with that. And when you don’t want to be angry, you’re pissed off that you are. Between the lover and the warrior, of course the warrior is going to win [I mean, who gets to workout more? Duh.] and will probably spout some bullshit about self empowerment into your inner-ear too just to add insult to injury.

extreme repentant w/ a high-lust chaser

Purgatory: You have escaped damnation and made it to Purgatory, a place where the dew of repentance washes off the stain of sin and girds the spirit with humility. Through contrition, confession, and satisfaction by works of righteousness, you must make your way up the mountain. As the sins are cleansed from your soul, you will be illuminated by the Sun of Divine Grace, and you will join other souls, smiling and happy, upon the summit of this mountain. Before long you will know the joys of Paradise as you ascend to the ethereal realm of Heaven.

Level Who are sent there? Score Purgatory Repenting Believers Extreme Level 1 - Limbo Virtuous Non-Believers High Level 2 Lustful High Level 3 Gluttonous Very Low Level 4 Prodigal and Avaricious Very Low Level 5 Wrathful and Gloomy Very Low Level 6 - The City of Dis Heretics Very Low Level 7 Violent Low Level 8- the Malebolge Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers Low Level 9 - Cocytus Treacherous Very Low

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

FaintedInk (aka LBG) got level 2, which as I recall was sex while bungee jumping for eternity. Could be worse.

"To Ramona (Dylan cover)," David Gray

Sparklehorse w/ Thom York – Wish You Were Here [Pink Floyd]

for Virgo this week: If you use email, you have a spam filter. You block out the sales pitches, fake information, and random noise that constantly flow toward your inbox. In the coming week, I urge you to expand your concept of what constitutes spam by shielding yourself against all the other junk food for thought that besieges you. Be ruthlessly discerning about the toxins that spew from the radio, TV, Web, newspapers, and magazines. Minimize your contact with narcissists who think "conversation" consists of you soaking up their compulsive self-revelations. You might even erect a psychic spam filter to repel the fearful images that sometimes bubble up from your subconscious mind.

hmm

bonus - Feist - “My Moon My Man”

self help reading + music

José González - How Low
José González Ft. Zero 7 - Crosses

Most philosophers believe that, other things being equal, simpler theories are better.

2nd millennium BC various Hindu groups in the Eastern world had established a voluntarily simplified spiritual lifestyle. This practice continued with various Abrahamic and Buddhist religious movements in the Middle East, Europe and Asia. Abraham, Moses, Gautama Buddha, John the Baptist, Jesus, and Muhammad all practised simple living, and many of their teachings recommend that their followers do likewise. Various notable individuals have claimed that spiritual inspiration led them to a simple living lifestyle, such as Francis of Assisi, Ammon Hennacy, Rabindranath Tagore, and Mahatma Gandhi.

For more information about Quaker simplicity see Testimony of Simplicity.

Henry David Thoreau

Epicureanism, based on the teachings of the Athens-based philosopher Epicurus, flourished from about the fourth century B.C.E. to the third century C.E.. Epicureanism upheld the untroubled life as the paradigm of happiness, made possible by carefully considered choices and avoidances. Specifically, Epicurus pointed out that troubles entailed by maintaining an extravagant lifestyle tend to outweigh the pleasure of partaking in it. He therefore concluded that what is necessary for happiness, bodily comfort, and life itself should be maintained at minimal cost, while all things beyond what is necessary for these should either be tempered by moderation or completely avoided.



Some people who practice voluntary simplicity act consciously to reduce their need for purchased services or goods and, by extension, their need to sell their time for money - to improve their own quality of life or well-being.

Andrew Bird and Norah O’Connor - Oh Sister

Words I hate

Phenomenal

Gripping
Nick Drake - Blues Run The Game

The Rolling Stones - Miss You (Dr. Dre Remix )

I’m orienting towards the upsides today – it’s a beautiful day, and was cold overnight, ie it’s fall. Which is iffy. On the one hand, it’s lovely. On the other, it precedes winter, and that bites. This isn’t boding well. But this is one of my favorite holidays. I still am hacking, but an upside to being back at work is The Weekend. For a while now, Fri and Sat have been the nights I have pointless collie syndrome a lot and I wait for Canadians to fall outa the sky. Today I got up and thought: no union meeting so I don’t have to go to work (yay). I’ll prolly be looking somewhat longingly at the sky in the very near future (ha hem), but for today I have been content to nap at will. I am babying my cold to get over it once and for all by tomorrow’s yoga class – I got up, ate soup, took a long nap in which I dreamed I ate bowl after bowl of cereal, Raisin Bran and Honey Smacks in rotation. Then I woke up and ate 5 bowls of Peanut Butter Crunch and read the dregs of the last TLS. We’re going to see The Brave One later cuz J’s crush has her all frustrated and wanting to shoot stuff, or see stuff get shot, or something something. Which is fine by me – although I’m jonesing to see Super Bad, I can toggle the “wanting to see Jodi Foster shoot stuff” mode, no problemo.

Speaking of seeing stuff, I forgot to mention that on my last night in WI, we all watched the new HBO show “Tell Me You Love Me”. So you can picture this: remember that my mother is included in the “we”, and all weekend long they made me watch “Starting Over House” until I truly and seriously wanted to kill myself. In the last episode of that, one of the women ‘started over’ by marrying herself, symbolic self love garbage-ola, with a white dress and the whole thing dum dum dee dum – GAG ME. Then [speaking of which (?)] it was my turn to pick and we cued up the HBO; I never thought I’d see Jane Alexander “slob on bob”, the phrase I learned this time from my bro-in-law, who just in general conversation teaches me another urban dictionary entry or two (cameltoe, butterface, fluffer . . . god, he is foul and funny) every time I go there. We kept covering our eyes like it was the Texas Chainsaw Massacre and laughing and laughing.

This post matches the day, full of a whole lotta nothing much.

Mountain Goats - The Boys are Back in Town (Thin Lizzy)

wa

I forgot about the slobberkiss-riskfactor. After they’re 3 years old or so, you can nzl the hell outa them without as much goo being involved, but before that they’re SARS in cute packages. You coulda fried an egg on my head overnight last night.

Still. Things might have been worse.

Today, back at work – I admit it, I sort of forgot about Work. That it’s kinda there, ya know, like, every day and stuff. I coughed up a left lung all over captive audiences all day long; me = an ugly bag of mostly mucus. But I guess I’m also remembering the upside of my job, that being In Charge means I can say what happens today, every day, so I gave quizzes to save my voice. My sister says that when working for a living starts to feel too much like working for a living, she imagines the jobs she’d hate to have instead. I totally do that too. For her, those are the ones that include catching/cleaning up puke. For me, it’s a hairnet or anything involving wearing a “visor”, Chucky’s Chicken or whatever on my forehead all day long.

Does everybody have a worst-case-scenario bomb shelter in their head for duck-and-cover thinking? Or is that just us?





Okkervil River-Unless it Kicks (acoustic)
Ron Sexsmith (ft. Chris Martin) - Gold in them Hills

I have a rotten slobberkisses daycaregerms headcold that bugged me yesterday and that baked my brains loose by this afternoon mid work day grrrr. God, I hate fevers. I hate being sick. More than anything. grumpy grumpy grumpy (i.e. wa wa wa)

ani difranco - falling is like this

Went to see Ani tonight w LBG and her sis. It was really good, at the church and all. I knew the bass player and the drummer from the airport. I watched them stand slightly apart from each other and very apart from everyone else. I guess I should have known who they were at the time, but I didn't, and didn't know Bitch either in the wings. They all just looked like whatever to me, people with their habits, ear-tucking hair or smoking cigarettes. I'd post a song from Ani's collection, but half way through the show I decided suddenly that I don't have the heart for any more shouting into the wind.

"Give a Little Love," Rilo Kiley

THE HUSSYS - ROCK STEADY

for virgo today: Are you growing impatient with someone? If you feel that by this point certain milestones should have been achieved haven't, then today is the day to speak up about it. Chances are, this person is completely unaware of your frustration. Step outside of yourself and realize that all your internal dialogue is silent -- no one else can hear it unless you voice it. Have courage to speak your mind and try to speed them along. They're more willing than you realize.

Violet and Frank

Last night with Vi. She watches me, her bright eyes following, and reaches for me to pick her up when I walk into the room now. I found her tickle spot - right between the nippies with a big loud blurp sound and she can't resist, sticks her fists into my hair and smears slobberkisses all over my face screaching with giggles. My sis looks on, says, Remember when you used to tickle me until I peed my pants?

Home, my kitchen smells funky. Way. :/

[nzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzln

zlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzl

nzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzln

zlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzl

nzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzlnzl]

for virgo this week: When big egos bluster and bounce off the walls, you're a master at cleaning up the messes. When glory hogs get careless about the details, you're good at patching up the resulting holes. And when people with stunted emotional intelligence try to assert their control-freak fantasies without acknowledging anyone's feelings, you can be the savior who steps in to prevent full-blown chaos from breaking out. I admire these skills of yours, Virgo, and I hope that you invoke them if necessary in the coming week. But I also want to make sure you know that you've been granted a poetic license to have a bigger ego than usual, and to flirt with being a benevolent glory hog, and to maybe even play around lightheartedly with your own control-freak fantasies.

a gallon

(straight from the milk of human kindness la la la)

Brand new from The Girls, I picked the selections below, though my faves tend to migrate around the cd over time:

Lay My Head Down

Little Perennials for neices and nephews
They Won’t Have Me for anybody who's ever wanted to keep a goat, basically

self-help reading
In the ocean are many bright strands and many dark strandslike veins that are seen when a wing is lifted up.Your hidden self is blood in those, those veins that are lute strings that make ocean music, not the sad edge of surf, but the sound of no shore.-Rumi

Ry Cooder -Brothers