Everything changed today, and I don't know why or how. I made a lot of phone calls and pulled a lot of triggers, so 🤷🏽‍♀️. Best guesses are the friend of mine who is a patient advocate in Memphis now making phone calls (and offering to fly here, today on a dime), or it was the nurse over the weekend who is not part of that unit normally and who gave me a side eye kinda thumbs up today so it could have been her. I honestly have no idea. The opacity and brutality of this system is gobsmacking, even to me who's been writing grants to fucking make it better for forever. 

As of now, the projected date of release for him to me and my custody of care is Wednesday. 

I hold my breath a lot. 

I hope I do not feel this stone cold forever. But maybe I should.

so long - the lumineers

I look like I've been nothing but crying for a year. 

It could always be Worse. I wish the Worse Gods could be appeased, I totally get it, Everything could be Worse. Ok? Do you need a 🕯 or some shit?