Scientific studies have proved what we all knew already: A person who's only mildly interesting to you will probably become more attractive if you drink a couple of pints of beer. What if I told you, Virgo, that in 2010 you could regularly create the same effect without drinking the beer? I have it on good astrological authority that this will be the case. Due to fundamental shifts in your relationship with the life force, and having nothing to do with how much alcohol you consume, the entire world will often be at least 25 percent more attractive to you than it ever was before.

Emiliana Torrini: I Hope That I Don’t Fall In Love With You

early morning massive bummer idea: google "good gifts for people who are dying quickly"

my first yoga teacher, Roberto, is dying of liver cancer, already in advanced stages - I've been sitting here for the long minutes since I read that email, breathing around the inward choking that Roberto was the first person to notice in me - he'd look at my throat, not my eyes, and say with command relax

FORECAST FOR THE WEEK AHEAD: The current conjunction of Pluto and Venus reminds us that relationships are cyclical and it's important to accept the changes that come with the seasons.

I'm not sleeping at night la la laaaa

right out my untrimmed chest la la la

MC Solaar – Bouge De La

watched this for the umteenth time

VIRGO FORECAST 2010: You'll initiate projects you know you can succeed with this year, but you won't stop at that. A challenge that is almost certain not to work out will be equally appealing to you. And if you can maintain a winning attitude and a high level of confidence, you'll defy the odds, finding success where many before you have failed. A big, daring purchase is featured in September.

Money and Career: Friends will be helpful to your business arrangements, though often in an indirect way. A turning point comes in May. There will be a chance for advancement in August. Your gratitude keeps you in good social and political standing.

Love: You will learn about yourself in romantic moments -- it's so interesting what others see in you. Singles go from friendship to love in March. [huh, ?, cz I have 'commit suicide to get out of it' scheduled for first thing in the morning on March 1] February and September are ideal times to travel with a loved one.

Personal Development: One of your talents is to connect with nature on a visceral level. Gardening, caring for animals or capturing the beauty of nature through photography or art will be a great source of healing, self-esteem and spirituality.

Rose Polenzani, Jennifer Kimball, Jordan Caress, and Ramona Silver: In The Bleak Midwinter

I am cold.

It's soltice weekend, the darkest days of the year. I went to a fire drumming ritual last night, which was a blaaaaaast. I love to dance and never do it anymore, the kinda dancing you do alone in a crowd and go nuts and work up a big sweat, and then go to Wendy's for a wee-hour munchfest off the dollar menu.

At the end of the ritual, everyone joins hands and spirals inward toward infirm or sick people who are in the center for healing. All night there's a lot of circling, Greek-wedding ft. conga, circle-dancing being the traditional choice for raising energy. Circling and twirling and letting fly, repeat repeat repeat. After all that booty-shaking, there's so much energy in the room and in your body, it's like we're all literally humming in our guts for the final circle, spiraling into a knot of vibration until the few suffering in the center are wrapped tight. That kind of thing is pretty powerful.

bootyshaking music (if it doesn't move your ass, then eat a cheeseburger cz obviously you need more ass then):
traditional african - tafadzwa (I could shake to this for days)
bonus track, florence + the machine - drumming song

anybody got any good voodoo?

So I'm done w the forum transforming with possibilities conference thingy and it was allll goooood, it was. For Ears, it was good, bc for a second I could stop hating his teacher so bad that I want to beat her to death with the bloody end of her own arm, and in that space of time we rewrote his History Day project to his own satisfaction, creating the possibility of his own satisfaction with his work being central to his education. And off he went with his new paper, happy as a clam.

Then the school called and requested a conference - Now, I know that my assumption that that Fucking Bitch of a Cunt of a Teacher is having some problem with the paper = a story I'm telling myself. I'm telling myself the story that just when the kid is okay for a second, they instinctively want to shit all over it to make themselves feel big because they're all so ugly that they haven't gotten laid since the dawn of time and never will. (That might only be true of me, actually.) The only FACT is that the school called, and all the rest that is in my head right now is only that, bullshit in my head that makes me upset. But. I want to get a gun and go over there and put it to her head until she pees her pants right now, that's the rub. And I realize I'm only going to ruin my own day with those feelings, but that realization only makes me want to ruin her day too with my feelings. I think I might be a terminal Asshole, no matter how many conferences I sign up for.

>:(

I'm trying so hard, but it's so not easy. I can try to let my feelings lead me to actions that are keeping with my goals and principles, and when they're in line with each other that's great, and when they're not well then it's kind of hellish. I know that that creates the change you need bc you're forced into it finally, to either feel like shit and keep situations that make you feel like that (martyrdom) or change the way you feel about them some kinda way (revelation?) or change the situation (generally my pick, and where I rediscover how capable I am if I have to be). But. See that question mark after "revelation"? That's because changing the way I feel about a situation when that situation itself is what it is and isn't going to change, huh, that one often escapes or stumps me. How do you do that? And life isn't fair, so situations that are way less than ideal and that's that are inevitable.

At the end, the guy who was running the conference said "I want you to have big breakdowns, bc the only way to never have big breakdowns is to have no big commitments. If you commit yourself to big things, then you'll fail sometimes inevitably. And that's perfect, it means you're trying to be truly alive." I'm trying to keep that in mind, hoping my guts will follow (and my heart will hold up).

John Dissed: Christmas with the Devil (Spinal Tap)

been learning to dream bigger over here - too bad a 3-day trip leaves 3 days worth of hotel food in my lower intestines though, that bums out the Anything-is-Possible mojo just a little if taking a decent crap isn't even possible

Trentemoller - Always Something Better

Kate Rusby: Let Me Be

(my ass still hurts so bad, omg, I can barely sit down to pee. but speaking of peeing, if you're a guy, pee while standing on your tip toes. the master yogi says you'll never get prostate cancer that way.)



(I know it's dumb, but the hairdryer cracked me up.)

for VIRGO For you, the beauty isn't just skin deep. When people get to know you, they start to discover that the inside is even prettier than the shiny outside. Your heart is what makes you so remarkable. (o shit then I got it backwards, I need an ass tattoo on my heart)

Das Palast Orchester “Sex Bomb” (Tom Jones)

i wish i could do this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dCFFxidhcy0&feature=player_embedded (speak fervently and well, i mean, not get married gay or otherwise)

yoga for 7 hours today. i threw my hip outa whack with a pop loud enough that everyone heard it like a fart only very different - and i learned microcosmic breathing and did yoga nidra (which is fantastic once you get the knack) with others for the first time . . . zzzzzz

In one of his short poems, John Averill describes a scene that I think captures the essence of your current astrological omens: "Today is the day of the photo of moonrise over Havana in a book on a shelf in the snowbound cabin." Here's a clue about what it means: The snowbound cabin is where you are right now in your life. The moonrise over Havana is where you could be early in 2010. How do you get there from here?

Mars is in 03 Degrees Leo. You are a very proud person. Strong, bold, courageous and self-possessed, you love to be the one to initiate significant actions. When people expect a lot of you, you respond positively and will work hard in order to maintain their respect. But when your dignity or pride is threatened, you tend to become sarcastic, arrogant and domineering. Try not to take any challenge or resistance that you meet as a personal affront. You are very stubborn about your right to live your life according to your own principles.

Devil In A Woodpile “Bron-Y-Aur Stomp” (Led Zeppelin)