Off to Mexico for mother's day. GIRLS ONLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Play me a song? Bill who? Wow, that is some fuckinpuckhead music.

(I shoulda kept that damn shirt)

VIRGO  Get into the kind of relationships you can handle. You know what you have time for and what you don't. You know what feels easy and what seems right but somehow isn't quite. Trust yourself.

Easier said than done. Porridge too hot. Porridge too cold. Wantdog's rapper name is Goldilocks.

scrying

ani - deferred gratification

Play me a song?
(snort)

bonus track, uh huh lalala
(I shoulda KEPT IT) 

Let's review how it was to be with the other man. None of that would have happened, for better and worse. Was it worth it? Would we do it all again?

Nebraska. He is courting me. I am honest with him but not an open book. I did mention that I love a man I couldn't be with. It just never works, I said. Nebraska accidentally got a divorce. He loved his wife but she didn't love him back enough, so he tried 'the polyamorous thing'. That NEVER works. So he understands 'it just never works' as a category. What else could I say? That my sons were 6 and 4 when we started, and now they are 21 and 19, and still after all that time, the man will not sleep over when they're here? Nebraska would come here on a plane and climb into my bed right now if I let him. Thank god he lives in Omaha, if he were in Cambridge he would have gotten a nexus pass the day he met me. So like Trainwreck, intent on me is his courtship style. Does not compute diffidence.

The ass tattoo was easier to explain than what we are. A friendship, just that, which is also a perennial loverplant. Even when it is gone it's still there, in the ground, waiting for warmth.

Always too hot or too cold. Why can't men just maintain a livable constant temp?

"I want ft. one shirt neither more nor less"

VIRGO Remind yourself of the qualities you prefer to see in the people you spend time with. New people are coming into your world and your choice of company can change who you are. 

The Dip - I Sure Don't Miss You

Weekend love VIRGO: All it takes is one move to bump friendship to the level of romance.  shakey graves - kiss the girl

Play me a song?

Moz-Suedehead

I could get used to this.

""working""

matt maeson- cringe (stripped)

I just looked at the weather. 34 to 98 to 55 to 100+ back to ? in the next 10 days, plus dessert to ocean back to Dampauffalo twice between. By the time I get to Boston, I will be a coffee bean with a chest cold covered in freckles.

Say la vee.

speak it

"Truth"

The Snake (LA LA LA!) - Oscar Brown Jr

VIRGO. Achilles had his heel. Sampson had his haircut. And you have your own version of a small vulnerability that has a disproportionately huge impact on your strength. Protect yourself accordingly.

Believing.

"Everyone leaves, if they need to, if they can, or if they have to." Lost Children Archives, Valera Luiselli

April. The cruelest month. He always starts cheating in Aprils. Pre Mother's Day. The a.m. birds chirping their brains loose remind me.

Column A - Honest commitment phobes (single).  Column B - repressed liars (not single). Both start out sending me songs and wanting to talk.

It doesn't bother me anymore. Because it isn't about me. I could be Jessica Alba. Except I am not.

I took myself vacation shopping yesterday, after getting a spring waxing (discipline before pleasure, gotta earn it). I bought a sexy bathing suit and a silk dress that cost a fortune because it felt very good against my smooth bare abraised skin. 

"April ft Shopping ft Ropes"

play me a song?

I say in my mind to you 'play me a song?' then I turn on the radio:

tail end of scared, I ask again and hit the search button: fully and completely

(headtilt)

wild child - expectations

It is a faithless cold world full of liars versus a warm vibrant world full of lovers, and I belong on neither team.

Something collapsed inside me.

VIRGO This is a new you, so clear your environment of all the unwanted reminders of the old you doing the old habits, and fill the space with symbols, tools and fuels that represent the new you.

(Armscrossy.) Oh hell no. This shit is not turning my head. I do not need a "new me". Universe, if you think I am keeping drawer space free for Mr Right ever again, you can suck it. In fact, I will know Mr Right by his willingness to leave one shirt with me. Neither more nor less.

Game of Thrones. That is all.

set adrift on memory bliss

I said "sure, if you will take me to dinner in Boston" (very armscrossy), which is an unreasonable demand to make of a man who lives in Omaha.

That is unlikely, of course, and even if he will do that, the chances of my shutting the door on him before any such thing are about 99.9%. But what if I kept making demands and he kept agreeing? What if I demanded a tattoo? I would never do that. Except I DID do that.

I did that.

And sooner or later, one of these dudes will stick, it is inevitable, I am not going to be celibate always waiting around. So. The questions will resume. What is your deal? That is a fair question.

My sexual orientation. Is peculiar. And has shaped my entire life. To be now alone. Which I prefer to be most of the time. But not always. Semi-Solo Nympho, that's the title of my next album (ha).

What's yours?

Some have seen the show, as The Washington Post put it, as a “revenge fantasy about what happens when women who have been brutalized and raped gain power. … Rape or enslave or shame a woman on ‘Game of Thrones’ and she will plot your murder, curse your unborn child in your womb, burn your capital city, bomb your place of worship, let you be torn apart by starving dogs or leave you to be blinded and tortured by a zombie knight acting out a grotesque pantomime of your own victimization.”

billie e - bury a friend

angry johnny - poe

the stable song - not Isaac isamov