birdfeeders make a mess but the birds remind me - they never look like they're wondering if life is worth it 

(but I do really want a cigarette already today)

my daughter

That's everyone's horoscope every day: You cannot kill yourself; think of something else.

(Everyone's horoscope has a semi-colon and nobody knows how to use those. Maybe that's part of the problem? 🤔)

I try not to forget what it felt like to love life. I want to jump into its arms, thrilled to see it again. As imperfect as it is.

But today, I have to report to the first dr what started all this: Ears has threatened suicide. He was 'joking sort of' but nope, he doesn't get to do that. So now what happens? 

I mean this as robustly as 100 pounds can muster: lay it on me. Try me, unless you're swinging from rafters or painting walls with your brains, I hear Nova's little assurance in my head: "Okay." Whatever it is.

parachute - cs

"snacks 👍"