The boss who started all of this in terms of the end of my career has been fired, which I should be happy about but I feel nothing about it at all. Instead of interpreting that as despondency, I'm going to choose to interpret it as "I'm over it". OVER IT in the sense of truly gotten past it, not just feeling like I want to put a fork in my eye. 

I am doing my normal drink coffee and cry thing in the mornings as my phone blows up and blows up about work news, about which I feel absolutely nothing. Not about that.  

I don't have any stretch marks that you can see, but I think I have a lot of them that ya can't. They're just signs that something happened and they fade.

I feel a lot. Sometimes, like yesterday, I can't hold it all, my arms don't reach. In a way all of this pain is a good thing, because it clarifies what matters enough to feel about and what does not anymore to try to hold in the first place.

song tbd