"Better to live in fear than in grinding discontent. Better to dare this new path than continue her slow, grim march down the road that had been chosen for her. At least the scenery would be different." ~The Familiar

I gotta pack up and head to Maricopa Co now to explain the difference between pain and suffering to about a couple hundred baby Dr's who look apx 12 years old and full of swagger (fear). They should definitely be afraid. It's almost cute the way they fear step exams n shit, "tests" that 99% are going to pass. They know they should be afraid of something but have no idea what (yet), so they pretend they're going through crucibles. The folks in charge keep telling them there's nothing to worry about, they are going to pass exams blabla, but I say no no let them pretend, play is how children learn. So tell them yes the stakes are high!, you might fail!, be afraid!, then when they all pass tell them how good they are. All practice for being those things for real. One must hope. 

Meanwhile hell breaks loose (again, and again) over my own days. Still the slow death spiral of a 6-year relationship while semi-employed-ish twice-over; that's been moved to category "chronic". 

50 ways to leave your lover - paul simon (There needs to be 150? 🤷🏻‍♀️) 

The most acute pain is that I have a trans child (the one who still lights ancestor candles for Stella the great dane) in this country right now. You might think you know anything about that but you don't. Not unless you have been forced to do the thought experiment of outliving your own child imminently at the mercy of others. Unless you've lived that, you have noooo idea how it is to live this 👁

his dog, who lives here and whom I solely care for and who presses her fat self into me every morning, butt-to-butt, while I *think*