Tuesday, July 12, 2016

Sitting here, just sitting, is the STAY version of being in the wind.

I am pondering my "best attributes". How do you know what those are without the mirror of other people? And do you listen to what other people say of you or witness your impact on them? Most people take words as truth. 'I love you' as simply true when someone says it, and to mean 'you are lovable' as well. And that seems dubious to me now, either assumption, about those words.

I prefer concrete reaction categories instead at this point. For instance, I know I am funny because the other person laughs, not because he says 'you are funny'. For your attributes, you would have to have evidence like that to be able to make a real list, I feel like.

What is the appreciable impact of you? How do others feel after they have come in contact with you, and how do you really know what that is? How can you know in what ways you left them better or worse, or nothing at all, for the minute or hour or year(s) you spent?

I am sitting here, also working. Among my (many) blessings: it is my job to think stuff. Next week a class starts. Personal Disasters, a short story class. And I will open it with these questions about personal attributes and the results of them. I am writing the questions down in my mind, staring at my feet in the tub.