My mom is staying a few weeks for the holidays as per usual. Except 'per usual' isn't what it used to be. I love her, but still it is a little bit of an off fit, like as if the pipes have been sweated askew now. She's better than most everyone else (well, she is my mother, so she's obliged to roll w the punches as best she can). As my friend Amy puts it, misery loves company and so your company might very well bail if you stray. And so it has been. Sunnie barely talks to me. It's not like a relationship is oo la la easy to make work in real life. It is a lot of simple showing up. It is a lot of laundry. But still, I want to be doing that work, as best I can. I hope it matters. I make soup. Meanwhile, he is sick right now, he is no yogi, he coughs and worries and works long hours (too long) and does not know how to breathe through his ears. Mom says "he is older than you are really, he's too worn down to have kids of his own anyway".

I hide in the bathroom from her.