"Bride Beaten on Her Wedding Night" 4.2006
from Chuck Shepherd's "News of the Weird":
A family has been found in Kurdish Turkey whose members walk on all fours, use the palms of their hands for balance, and stand upright only with difficulty, according to researchers who filmed the family for a March British television show.
[At this point reading this, I thought, wow this testifies to the Will to Love. I mean, what are the chances of two people who walk on all fours finding each other in this wide world? And think of the challenges of eye contact, lack thereof in this case, not to mention the inevitable cultural pressures against them . . . Imagine straightfacing the wedding planner! If they could look up, I mean. I'm about to get a warm fuzzy feeling practically just thinking about it . . . but wait . . . ]
According to Professor Nicholas Humphrey of the London School of Economics, scientists' best guess for the family's condition is that their inbreeding caused the reprise of genetic traits long thought to have been evolutionarily passed over.
[shit. He was her little brother. gross. lol.]
Joy to the World (Jeremiah was a Bullfrog) --[my first favorite song of all time, played endlessly on my Fischer Price turntable]
