update ("Vulnerability is a strength. It's not a mistake." - DmS)

TJ over brownies for dessert (I added heath bar bits in the batter): “I’m glad you’re my mother because although you have a lot of shortcomings like swearing a LOT a man would like to think that no matter what else is going on or really stinks that his mother at least really loves him otherwise a part of him dies on the inside and starts to smell like a rotting corpse.”

Me: (pause) Thanks. And, you're welcome.

idea man

listening to: helenamaria - rude boy (rihanna)

XVII - The Star

With Aquarius as its ruling sign, The Star is a card that looks to the future. It does not predict any immediate or powerful change, but it does predict hope and healing. This card suggests clarity of vision, spiritual insight. And, most importantly, that unexpected help will be coming. The Star is one of those cards everyone loves. In every deck, it is usually the most beautiful. Whatever hope, healing, or future it offers, however, the reader must remember that it might not be immediate. This is a soft card, and like Aquarius, its vision is for tomorrow, not today.



WEEKEND LOVE FORECAST: ARIES: You make people feel good about themselves, and they keep coming back for more. TAURUS: You'll make the first approach and will be glad you did. GEMINI: Emphasize the ways in which you are different from the rest. CANCER: You have ideas about how things will develop that are not what a loved one currently has in mind. But when you share your views, you'll find common ground. LEO: You will be given your way, but don't take it if it is given reluctantly. VIRGO: You want something that couldn't be in the past. But things are different now, and it's time to try again. LIBRA: There is someone who makes you feel beautiful or handsome, and you love being around this person for that very reason. SCORPIO: Your commitment to a person extends to his or her family. Your life is richer with this many people on your side. SAGITTARIUS: Someone wants to celebrate you, and you should let this person do it. CAPRICORN: You may be nervous and unsure about how to interact, but this won't stop you from making a fantastic impression. AQUARIUS: Your great compassion makes you all the more attractive. PISCES: You'll be haunted by the memory of a past love.

XX - Judgement

VII - The Chariot

X - Wheel of Fortune
(the 8ball says "karma")

XXI - The World

"Artists suffer for their work, but they don't mind," read the headline in the San Francisco Chronicle. The attached article featured brief interviews with five artists who all said they enjoy doing their creative work so much that they gladly put up with the privations it causes them. That's the spirit I'd like you to embrace in the coming weeks, Virgo. See if you can immerse yourself in a labor of love with so much enthusiastic devotion that you drive away some of your aches and anxieties.

I'd rather be working at whatever it is than just abstractly being "in it". I prefer to work, generally speaking

listening to: Lenka - Gravity Rides Everything p.s. go outside and look up, it's an autumn equinox full moon

I value small habits of kindness.

toggle: auto pilot

the little willies - I gotta get drunk
barbara - the pursuit of happiness (brilliant)
for The Girl - fuck you

I'm not kidding, check it out. They're all pretty cool looking, but the one that can just opened up under your feet in the middle of a city . . . in real life, I mean . . . gives me paws.

On a symbolic note, losing things in your dream suggests lost opportunities, past relationships or forgotten aspects of yourself. Your personal associations to the thing you lose will clue you into the emotional meaning and interpretation of your dream.

To dream that someone else is lost, represents some unresolved issues or feelings pertaining to the person that is lost. Consider what aspect of that person you may have lost within your own self. Perhaps you need to recapture and re-acknowledge those aspects.

To see the black hole in your dream, indicates that there is no turning back, as on a decision you have made.

labelle - it took a long time, from the "Precious" soundtrack (note of advice: don't watch that movie before you go to sleep)

That's me and a guy I work with, whom I affectionately call F-Bomb bc he never swears but if he does then he says "F-Bomb" instead of the real thing. (Why do I like priests and nuns so much?) We were at an obligatory work-thing, to which I wore my anti-President clothes, resenting the bla bla the whole time, which of course he resented too but he was (OF COURSE) being good about it. He sent me this pic last night, saying "your facial reactions tell it all!" It cracked me up just when I needed the giggle. [but that is an uglyass look on my face, eek I had to shrink it]

WEEKEND LOVE FORECAST: ARIES: Your attraction secret for the weekend: Look inward more than outward. TAURUS: Contributing to the happiness of those you love might be hard work for you, but at least in the end you get to share that happiness. GEMINI: You can protect your right to do as you please in a way that doesn't offend or put another person out. CANCER: Enthusiasm is the key to making a stellar impression. It takes confidence to emote publicly! LEO: Give your loved one props. If there is no apparent reason to do so, invent one. VIRGO: Your observations about love are right on the money, though you still need to be careful of whom you share them with and how. LIBRA: You don't need to ride the high rollercoaster or bungee jump to feel powerfully alive. Love is your great thrill. SCORPIO: Your protective instinct is strong now, and loved ones feel safe near you. SAGITTARIUS: It has been proved that laughter promotes healing, and it can do the same for an ailing relationship. CAPRICORN: When you talk about your loved ones, you will put them in the best possible light. AQUARIUS: You will see things as your loved one sees them. PISCES: You may not care, but it's nice when you find out that a loved one's friends think the world of you.

Remember that dude I fired? Well, I've seen him in hallways chatting his brains loose, looking happy for the first time since I met his sorry ass, so I made sure, cz that Nun she can pull fast ones on ya and rehire people you've fired outa the kindness of her heart typa deal. But nope, he's just free to do what he actually wants now that he has no choice. He might even be tolerable deep down! Not to me, of course, he thinks I'm a cast iron bitch. But that's cool, cz that works for me pretty much.

Meanwhile, I pulled the death card for my day and nothing at all bad happened. Fuck the death card. I'm not worrying, it takes up too much room in my heart for nothing.

Jeffrey Foucault (I love this dude, his voice melts my panties off, his Johnny99 song rocks my shimmying ass around in the carseat dancing, love him) - Love is a Rose (Neil Young cover)

WEEKEND LOVE FORECAST: ARIES: Go at your own speed. Don't let anyone push you into a relationship you're not entirely comfortable with. TAURUS: Everyone wants to deal with a straightforward person such as yourself. GEMINI: Get comfortable with yourself. Your comfort level will determine how others feel when they are around you. CANCER: You will be persuasive. Your excitement will inspire others. LEO: You have your own take on the situation, and a loved one really could use your viewpoint. VIRGO: Your standards are high, and they will be met. [perfect! exactly what I want + nothing I don't] LIBRA: Finish what you start -- your follow-through will be impressive to potential loves. SCORPIO: Touch will be healing for you. Give and receive a back rub. SAGITTARIUS: Make sure your expectations are not unreasonable. Get a second opinion. CAPRICORN: You'll give up something for love, which is fine. AQUARIUS: You clean up the mess, unstick the thing that was stuck and generally solve the problems your loved ones are having. PISCES: Depth. It's what they love about you. With you, there is always more than meets the eye.

helena maria - rude boy (rihanna)

In a moment, it is over. Things that can't stand, are built on shoddy foundations, things that reach for the sky before they take the time to build from the ground up rightfully . . . they crumble to rubble because they must and they will. Stunned and shaken to the core, we experience grief, profound fear and disbelief. But also, a strange clarity of vision, as if our inner eye has finally opened. When the rug is pulled out from under us, we learn what is rock beneath and what is shifting sand. This the hardest point of the tarot deck, the hardest thing for us to endure: the destruction of the lies we tell ourselves about ourselves. What's left is the bare, absolute truth. On this we can rebuild our souls. Rebuilt, we can count on ourselves . . and so can other people.

The Moon card is all about visions and illusions, madness, genius and poetry. This is a card that has to do with sleep, and so with both dreams and nightmares. It warns that there might be hidden enemies, tricks and falsehoods. But it should also be remembered that this is a card of great creativity, of powerful magic, primal feelings and intuition. The Querent who gets this card should be warned that they may be going through a time of emotional and mental trial; they must be vigilant in protecting their psychic boundaries, (especially if born under a Pisces moon). This time however, can also result in great creativity, psychic powers, visions and insight. They can and should trust their gut.



Forecast: By midweek, the sun, the moon and Mercury will all bask in Virgo's nurturing earth-sign energy. Virgo makes things blossom. Wednesday brings the new moon in Virgo, the ideal moment for setting a major goal in motion. Whether you want to grow a business or strengthen a relationship, get your intention clear so you can state it on Wednesday. A ritual -- preferably one of your own design -- will set the stage for the next cycle. This does not have to be an elaborate event. Setting time aside to write down your goals or make an inspiration board will be sufficient in establishing your purpose. Also happening on Wednesday: Love planet Venus enters passionate Scorpio. Feelings will start to intensify right away. The trick is to focus on the positive emotions that will improve your health, vitality and well-being. Caution: The melodrama of unrequited love or any variety of impossible romance will have a certain strong seduction. Steer clear of this silliness, or at least keep it contained to the realm of entertainment. As exciting as such affairs may seem, it is much better to read a book about tortured romance than to live it in real time.

WEEKEND LOVE FORECAST: ARIES: Your oddball interests will lead you to one as quirky as you. TAURUS: A different social lineup will put excitement into your love life. GEMINI: Talk to three strangers. At least one will make you glad you initiated contact. CANCER: Your accomplishments are impressive -- even more so when you don't tell people about them all at once. Let it leak slowly. LEO: Hot prospects will be interested in you, but only after you loosen them up by showing interest in them first. VIRGO: There's an important task at hand. You could do it in your sleep, but let a loved one do it anyway -- just to balance things out. [hmm how about I let someone else be the most sober and defensively solitary person?] LIBRA: Be ready with interesting topics to dish, in case the conversation devolves. SCORPIO: You have that special glow about you again. SAGITTARIUS: Trust a loved one, and this person will trust you right back. CAPRICORN: No need to look around for someone to sizzle up a humdrum scene. You are the spice. AQUARIUS: Your flaw is apparent, and that's good news -- someone thinks it's one of your most attractive qualities. PISCES: Hang with someone who can groove without getting too offended by this imperfect world.

eddie v - wishlist