I made the first of these a while ago, sketching myself onto my pond, but now there is a new garden. It is young yet. What there is of it so far, roses and a fountain and pots of herbs, I added them because in my mind they are layers. Just like memories. And as always, I hold vigils.

OTW - the marriage of coyote women

very funny 

...ya know what I'm never going to do? Have Facebook. Troll anybody. Destabilize anyone's life (callously). Show up on anyone's doorstep uninvited. Be visible anywhere in any way where that would be untoward or intrusive. Use anyone's identifying information. Even my diary is encoded.

That's my actual appeal right? Be yourself, I won't flinch or betray a soul.

And I'm grateful to Universe, because though it has upset my equilibrium (a lot), it clarified some feelings as well.

Lovers card. Choices card. I am open to offers but I am not up for grabs. smib

native tongue - switchfoot

VIRGO What you have is perfectly suited to solving another person's problem. Your effort is better spent finding that person with whom you share compatible needs than trying to change yourself for someone who's a bad fit anyway.

I was listening to TED radio hour yesterday. How to get over it. Upshot: you never get over it.

Kraak&Smaak ft Lex Empress - Hold Back Love (lovebirds remix)

There is absolutely nothing as valuable as a truly safe space friend, man or woman. Nothing.

Keeping uncomplicated company tonight. My nerves are shot.

(Toronto.)

god damn it I can't get this out of my head It's like The Smiths, I DON'T EVEN LIKE IT but I love it. C'mon, "like an oyster" is insane, who SINGS THAT??

'made you miss'

VIRGO. The two main causes of human suffering are malice and ignorance. So anything learned is a counterbalance to human suffering, and any love given or received lessens the world's misery.

smib

"cotttage porn"

My sister comes here through Canada. We all get around a lot lately. Canada seems so huge that just using it as a thru-put didn't occur to me much but I could be in Detroit by late afternoon if I felt like it, to my cottage before sunset if I got one there. If I felt like it. I've been off the cottage thing, preferring to just see the world for a while, even just the rest of the states. But everywhere I go, I always imagine myself. As always.

atlas genius can't be alone tonight

Still recovering from a work retreat yesterday for 'creative ideas', during which I did nothing but resent it and play with playdoh. Gimmicky bullshit + pms, not a good combo at all. I have to sit here now rocking my bedhead like I just don't care, reminding myself that I have an excellent life and a fantastic job and am lucky entirely, which is all very true.

"workworm and stupidideas"

pms

Feed me cheese.

VIRGO  You're starting to notice that there's a mischievous side to to someone, and this is part of what keeps you so fascinated. It's a firecracker situation. Light it, and throw it. If you hold on, it will cause injury.

To cause me injury is the very least innovative thing any man could do.

death cab - black sun

RIP dr john

"guilded splinter"

VIRGO. In this readymade world, the custom item, designed to fit a specific need and handmade to extremely particular standards is scarce indeed. Scarcity creates value. Your love is a custom fit and very valuable.

What's it worth? Show me.

glorious sons - gordie

I lived.

The med isn't strong enough, strain of e coli is resistant. Now I'm too scared to be furious.

These drugs are making me utterly insane. Like I seriously am just having feelings like rage *seize me* and I am clenching my jaw trying to keep it together because I KNOW this is a drug not me not me this is not.

And my hair turned to straw in 5 days.

And massive fucking headache.

I am playing the goat tapes in my head,  you really whizzed that thing

I hired help. I have to get out of this bed to open the door. It feels like a lot of work to do that. My head pounding.

I lasted an hour at work today. Back in bed. Ya ever get sick and feel so grateful for your bed that you think about homeless people and then lie there and cry?